What do you suggest? Should I have a relationship with someone I don't love?

I'm a 26 year old heterosexual man currently studying in United States, but originally from an Asian country. I'm also a virgin. And I've been told I'm good looking. The reason why I'm a virgin follows.

My childhood was spent in an all male boarding school until my high school, where there was very little chance of female contact. I came home for vacations, but our family was sort of isolated, and I would often spend months in the house with my very strict parents, with whom I had no close personal relation (I always felt they controlled me, not loved me). From there it was straight to a merchant marine academy, where part of the training was to acclimatize us for long sea voyages, and we were given very little leave. But life aboard a ship was not as romantic as I hoped for, and I quit after getting the diploma. At the end of all this, I was 21.

Then I went to college. This was my first time having real contact with females. I had several crushes during my four years in college, and at least three of which developed in to full blown obsessions. Actually, these obsessions were a way of giving a purpose to my life. I imagined that I was working to possess them, and that kept me working towards a goal.

Now, I've come here for my graduate degree. I'm tired of working so hard for a long time, and I feel like my life has no meaning. I'm lonely, fantasize everyday about finding true love, and masturbate profusely. And even though girls show their interest in me, I do not make a move on them because I think they somehow measure up to my standards for a long term relationship, or because I tell myself I don't need a casual relationship. But I'm lonely as hell.



Will having a casual relationship cure my loneliness? I don't get in to one because in my minds eye, I can't imagine myself having intense feelings for someone who I do not trust and expect will leave me someday. And I'm afraid of getting too emotionally attached. It's not the sex part I want, just that I have this void to fill this big void. Will finding a short term partner do this, or will I have to wait until I find someone that I can love wholeheartedly? I have never been in a relationship with anyone before.What do you suggest? Should I have a relationship with someone I don't love?
You should never enter a serious relationship with a girl you don't love. Just wait for Mrs. Right, dont worry she will come into your life.
I didnt read the whole question but if you want a realationship just get some friends, flirt a bit, if one asks you out then take the chance, you might like it. Or if you like someone else then ask them out.What do you suggest? Should I have a relationship with someone I don't love?
to develop you have to go into a relationship, its hard to trust people and yes people will let you down with there trust but ut makes you grow, i only ever fully trusted two people in my life my ex girlfriend and my wee sister who 14,



you can be with someone and explain what your looking for, once your with someone and you hasve the family talk you know there afurter with the person, by family talk i mean yous talking about each other family and asking questiomns
just go out and live your life...the way you want to live your life.



if the relationship happens. it happens.



do what ever makes you happy.What do you suggest? Should I have a relationship with someone I don't love?
maybe its not a girlfriend you are looking for... maybe its just friends. i think you should just open up to lots of girls small talk leading to personal personal maybe leading to girlfriend boyfriend :D good luck :)
open you horizons, make some friends and see where things take you. its never a good idea to love anybody that you have no real feeling for. its better to be happy than feel like a mistake. can i offer maybe creating an account on a friendship site? or a dating site, sometimes you can really get to know and find alot of interesting people. one day you'll find someone dude, it takes time :) good luck



becides ur still in college? try to talk to fellow classmates and make friends with them, or join clubs that you like. anythings possible
Nope.



You'll just be cheating the other person

and possibly AND probably hurting your-

self in the end. Your lonliness couldn't

be cured by being in a relatioship with

someone you don't love. It just couldn't.

Perhaps for a little while, but it wouldn't

last forever.



I know that lonliness is hell in itself, but

it's alot better to have someone walk into

your life who you really love. It'd be much

more worth it.



Ultimately, your decision. But I don't think

you should be with someone-under any

circumstance-to help with lonliness.



Good luck, nevertheless. :)
Uhhhh... tough call. I'd say that you should try to date some more cuz having more contact with others will probobly cure your lonliness. also pick a hobby or something. finding people that enjoy things you do and interacting with them will probably cure it. as for the final final final final final final back up plan... try eharmony.com or something lol. just get used to people... oh and i feel bad 4 ur childhood T_T. Good luck!
Please don't date a person that you're not in love with.

Whats the point of dating a person who you have no feelings for.

It's pointless.

Let that person be happy with someone that truly love her.
if you don't like the person then no because it will just cause problems problems and more problems!!
You don't have to love someone to be in a relationship with them. But if you have your eye on a certain girl ask her out on a date. You don't have to know her well, but GET to know her. If it works maybe there will be a relationship in the near future. Maybe you will eventually fall in love with the girl but who knows.
First let's separate sex, love, friendship, and relationships. You like all other men crave companionship, and the feeling of being loved especially from the sex of your choice. Your sexual desires are being met physically and that is healthy from the standpoint of relieving yourself and then again to empty out the vasdeferin Storage sacks daily just as you do the other wastes of your body. Over one million sperm are produced daily along with new fresh seaman. So keep healthy in the physical sense.

With the loneliness feeling. I recommend that you do start socializing and meet and make a friend first. Friendships lead to relationship and romance. You have to do your part as a male to lure the female with your best qualities. She will do the same for you. So, get on with it and fulfill the void.

Don't rush it,...just mix socially and let it happen dude. You will do okay.!!! Don't let it get you down.!!





grasshopper
Casual relationships and dating can often lead to something more serious. Even if you don't see yourself loving someone you are just seeing, things can change and you can find yourself loving them eventually. Casual relationships are often the starting point to something really meaningful. If they don't lead you anywhere, you can learn a lot from them and it will help ease the loneliness you feel. I think you should give casual relationships a try. If anything it'll be fun and it might lead to meeting new people and maybe even the love of your life.
in america a 26 year old man is very young. you sound like you have a lot to offer, just relax and befriend people and go from there.
No. Having a "casual relationship" will not "cure" your loneliness. It could give you something/one to do, but that's only a short-term solution. You have to think long-term if you want to be happy. Next time you find yourself interested in someone, be open-minded, expect the unexpected BUT don't stress over it. Relationships have their ups and downs %26amp; its natural. Don't ruin your life and relationships because your not being open with oppertunities. Being a virgin isnt a problem. Someone who sincerely loves you will see past that.